Have you ever wanted something so bad you could taste it? Or better yet, was there something you knew you were destined for, and nothing on this earth could keep you from believing it would happen? Well that’s been me for practically my entire life. I’ve always known that creativity would be the segue to my success…I just didn’t know how, or when, which has probably been the most frustrating part. For all of my life I’ve felt that my dreams were reality, my reality was temporary, and no one could convince me otherwise.
Over the past few months I have been running on fumes….literally. Here I am: a single mother, author, and full time employee among many other hats. My brother once called me an overachiever, and most of my friends have reprimanded me for not knowing when to say no; but both of these flaws I wear like badges of honor. I realize that constantly trying to outdo myself can seem a little crazy, but I have this need to be that woman who gains success by her own standards, and catapults the success of the people around me that I love and have nurtured my vision.
I recently met with more than a few Hollywood Execs regarding my ideas for the Eternal Series. This was a pivotal moment in my life that reiterated how infectious my love and passion for creation was. Before every meeting I had this premonitory notion that whomever I was about to speak with would love me. Not only that but this book series, which for almost three years has become my baby, would leave them amazed. I cried, prayed, fought, and put my pennies aside for months for this very moment. People believed in me, believed in my work, sowed into my life to make sure this moment happened…and I refused to let them, and myself, down. Those couple of days I spent repeating my synopsis over and over, handing out business card after business card, answering question after question was well worth every sacrifice, every tear and every lost hour of sleep.
So, for the past three days I’ve been promoting Eternal Soul, Eternal Love, and the soon to be completed Eternal Vengeance on social media (making the most of my temporary reality). And just when I was thinking that I had exhausted my readers that had been following my work from the very beginning, a wave of people were reaching out, asking how to get copies of my books and/or if book three was ready for purchase. It was like someone added lighter fluid to the already smoldering flame that was my drive for success. Creative people can sometimes have this fear that somehow either their gifts would be overlooked or go unappreciated. I am no different. I consider this one of my greatest flaws. I subconsciously have this need for the work I do to be praised. Honestly, if I don’t get it that doesn’t mean that I’m going to lose myself and quit, but hearing the words does feel really good.
So now I sit here, back in my routine, but a little different; a little more evolved. I’m here, working my Monday to Friday job, being mommy to my twins, still writing and working on my third book while attempting to have a social life. It’s hard, it’s always been hard (and exhausting), but I do it because I have no choice; I do it because nothing is impossible. I do it all because I know that soon, whether by phone or email, I’m going to receive the news I’ve been waiting my entire life for. News that’s going to change me, my kids and my family’s lives forever. I don’t believe it…I know it, because I am Eternally Blessed.